Walks to Take, Pills to Swallow, and My Solemn Vow

And then of course I remember my solemn vow, but these early mornings when first opening the door onto the upstairs front porch to test the day, I hope to somehow be hit in the face with a blast of arctic air. 

A hope that I will bitterly rue on the second of January.

The umpteenth morning as I wake in the wee hours to the tune of the snowplow blade covering my car parked by the curb, and hear the bell in the nearby channel of Narragansett Bay, drift back to my dream, too soon wake again, curse, dress and go out into the bone-chilling cold to find my car among the white lumps, shovel it out, sweep snow from roof, windshield and hood, scrape ice from windshield, break wiper blade loose, pour hot water around door gasket and on driver door handle to thaw lock, open door, get inside, with numb fingers insert key in ignition, turn key and hear either click-click-dead-silence or engine slowly, slowly, slowly begin to turn over rrrunh-rrrunh-runh-runh in an action once called crank as hands freeze and body trembles and shakes in the bitter subterranean hell of New England winter, curse heaven and swear Never Again will I complain about the roasting, baking heat when I get into a breathtakingly stifling hot car on an August afternoon, This is my Solemn Vow.

But I do love Newport, Rhode Island with all my heart and memories and all its lobsters and clams.

This blog post is entitled Sour Grapes and Range Crow

Gratifying to read in BleacherReport that Jesus Wilson is sorry he was caught stealing a scooter, and so has been reinstated as WR. Poor play, poor call, poor execution, and who called the cops, it was only meant for the greater glory of the garnet and gold. The scooter was to be Jameis’ getaway vehicle for his next heist, a sack of peanuts from Five Guys. It was to have been the Seminole recruiting publicity of the century, a fast scooter weaving in and out of traffic being pursued by black and whites flashing roof-racks and screaming sirens, topside the Channel 2 chopper with live coverage and Willie M on the cell with Jimbo. Try as he might, Jimbo will never match our Aaron, because Gators are not into petty larceny. Namesake and all, Jesus is proud and neither do we condemn thee. Go ‘Noles and sin no more.

To be known as the Hot Ess Conference, a new NCAA conference of Elephants, Indians and Aggies will rotate playing only each other all CFB season until the Eugene Field Syndrome plays itself out in the Chinese Plate on New Years Day.      

Losers make bad losers. Living in 'Noles territory (and it wasn't always such) is a bitter pill. As penance I’ve ordered our Thanksgiving Crow, cancelled my SEC Channel subscription, lied that I'm truly sorry and humbly repent, and pronounced Absolution anyway.

Schäme dich, Father T, it’s Church Night.

No it isn’t. Church Night resumes next Wednesday. 

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