what then?
Sundays of the Easter Season have a theme, Easter Four is Good Shepherd Sunday, and it seems appropriate this year that our bishop will be here, being chief shepherd of the diocese. The bishop carries a staff of some sort. Charles Duvall's staff was a wooden shepherd's crook, I don't know if it was passed along to Bishop Duncan and now Russell Kendrick, but Sunday we may see.
Wednesday evenings at church our rector always has a short sermon, or more a homily on the scripture that was just read. In this case it's always on the gospel for the upcoming Sunday. We'd stopped going to the Wednesday service because we've become so uneasy driving after dark, but we went last night, our hosts served a scrumptious fish fry, piping hot catfish, fried real potatoes like we had for supper when I was a boy, and heavenly delicious cheese grits. What's more, the timing worked out beautifully, still light at seven o'clock when we arrived home.
But the homily: a selective and imaginative take on the gospel reading:
John 10:22-30
... the festival of the Dedication took place in Jerusalem. It was winter, and Jesus was walking in the temple, in the portico of Solomon. So the Judeans gathered around him and said to him, "How long will you keep us in suspense? If you are the Messiah, tell us plainly." Jesus answered, "I have told you, and you do not believe. The works that I do in my Father's name testify to me; but you do not believe, because you do not belong to my sheep. My sheep hear my voice. I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish. No one will snatch them out of my hand. What my Father has given me is greater than all else, and no one can snatch it out of the Father's hand. The Father and I are one."
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Evidently he was not the Messiah, undoubtedly was not meeting their expectations, was not what they'd expected to see, was not doing what they expected the Messiah to do.
It's an astonishing story, told only by Gospel John, who pictures Jesus as quite assertive about who he is, far more self-revealing than as he is presented in the synoptics.
Anyway, the homiletic question is about what they, in this case the Judeans questioning Jesus, expected of him, or really, of the Messiah, of Jesus if he was the Messiah. What are they expecting, what do they expect of Jesus? to raise up a power, throw the foreigners out of the Holy Land, establish or reestablish the storied golden days of the kingdom of David and Solomon? Well, he didn't. That was what they expected, and they were disappointed.
So the question becomes, what do we expect of him, it's personal, what do YOU, what do I expect of him? What do we expect of the one we call Christ?
Whatever you or I expect of him, we will almost surely be disappointed, because meeting human expectations is not what he is about. Indeed, if we believe that his role is to meet our expectations, to satisfy our wants and needs, then we have created a Christ to our own specifications. What? to provide for us? clothing? shelter? daily bread? to forgive our sins? to protect us from sickness and harm in this life? to affirm and bless our certainties? to be on my side in all of life's battles? to save us into our notion of paradise when we die? What do we expect of him? IDK, I'm really struggling with the question. I wasn't expecting this - - I went to church for fried fish and cheese grits last evening, and came home unable to sleep because I don't have answers, a problem of pastoral and theological contemplation is always more questions than answers.
Honestly, I just don't know. Am I to work it out so there's a soft answer that cannot be tested or disproved? hear my prayer? accept my praise? grieve with me? love me unconditionally? share my pain and sadness? rejoice with me? Is he for me, or am I for him? It's 1954, we're dancing as Doris Day sings,
If I give my heart to you
Will you handle it with care
Will you always treat me tenderly
And in every way be fair
If I give my heart to you
Will you give me all your love
Will you swear that you'll be true to me
By the light that shines above
And will you sigh with me when I'm sad
Smile with me when I'm glad
And always be as you are with me tonight
Think it over and be sure
Please don't answer till you do
When you promise all those things to me
Then I'll give my heart to you
And will you sigh with me when I'm sad
Smile with me when I'm glad
And always be as you are with me tonight
Think it over and be sure
Please don't answer till you do
When you promise all those things to me
Then I'll give my heart to you
What then? Is the Baptismal Covenant not transactional? Yes, I am to keep my promises; but am I not to have expectations, to expect anything in return? Or is it simply to expect just this: to live and love and Be, and marvel that I Am and Have Been?
IDK
I do know: lifelong, the Episcopal Church, centered in parishes, in local congregations, not dioceses nor general conventions nor worldwide communions, has been for me a place where one cares deeply for people who are different, who have completely different convictions from mine on everything about life, religion, faith, economics, politics, social issues.
RSF&PTL
T