Dark Chocolate


Dark Chocolate

Hear this, O elders,
   give ear, all inhabitants of the land!
Has such a thing happened in your days,
   or in the days of your ancestors?
 Tell your children of it,
   and let your children tell their children,
   and their children another generation. 

It would be heresy to say Lent is fun, but Lent is certainly an interesting season, especially perhaps its opening gate. 

Sanctify a fast,
   call a solemn assembly.
Coming up against Lent, we “shrive” the house and our lives of wicked things, sin and sweets and fatty foods, and having shrived, shrove, shriven, we gorge on a gluttonous stack of pancakes loaded with butter and sweet syrup on Mardi Gras, “fat Tuesday.” 

What the cutting locust left,
   the swarming locust has eaten.
What the swarming locust left,
   the hopping locust has eaten,
and what the hopping locust left,
   the destroying locust has eaten. 


Anyone who thinks that isn’t fun hasn’t strung a bunch of purple, green and gold beads around their neck, sat down behind a tall stack, and reached for butter and maple or cane syrup. 

Alas for the day!
For the day of the Lord is near,
   and as destruction from Shaddai it comes.

Shrove at the gate to Lent, we pass through into penitence, our purple season of giving up something, something we feel isn’t good for us. Television, alcohol, sweets. Couch sitting instead of intentional exercise. 

I will repay you for the years
    that the swarming locust has eaten,
the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter,
    my great army, which I sent against you.

Chocolate? Dark chocolate is healthy, give up milk chocolate and switch to dark chocolate for Lent: by the time Lent is over one may have developed a healthy preference for dark chocolate. 

Proclaim this among the nations:
Prepare war,
    stir up the warriors.
Let all the soldiers draw near,
    let them come up.
Beat your plowshares into swords,
    and your pruning hooks into spears;
    let the weakling say, “I am a warrior.”

Which reminds me. Years ago I challenged my congregation gently and lightly as to why they insisted on using only Rite One for Sunday worship. The response, “Oh, Father Weller, we’re not ready for Rite Two.” When Lent came I told them that their penance would be liturgical: for Lent we would worship only using Rite Two. Totally unexpected to me, when Lent was over they asked to stay with Rite Two. 

The Lord roars from Zion,
    and utters his voice from Jerusalem,
    and the heavens and the earth shake.

Artificial sweeteners and artificial creamers are unhealthy. For Lent, switch to sugar and cream; or gird up your loins and drink it black: by the time Easter comes you may prefer our Navy coffee.

The forty days of the Lenten fast do not include Sundays; so whatever is given up for Lent is remitted every Sunday: drink up, eat up, or smoke ‘em if you got ‘em.

I will remove the northern army far from you,
   and drive it into a parched and desolate land,
its front into the eastern sea,
   and its rear into the western sea;
its stench and foul smell will rise up.
The Bible verses above and scattered through this post are various from Joel, because Lent really is fun, especially as a time to enjoy learning something.  A reading from Joel is one of our Old Testament options for Ash Wednesday, the Lenten Gate. Joel is especially great because of the contention it enjoys among scholars, including Hebrew scholars and rabbis. The best thing about scholars and scholarship is the contention: no two scholars agree on anything, and sometimes the disagreement gets right vigorous. 

Nothing is known about Joel ben-Pethuel, or when he wrote. Was it pre-exilic or post-exilic? Was Joel writing against a horde of locusts or against apocalyptic locusts, an invading army from the north? Is the Book of Joel a unity or is it in two or more parts, with additions over time?  

Joel is a writing that shows the Lord God can be both destroying enemy and defending savior. 

On that day
the mountains shall drip sweet wine,
   the hills shall flow with milk,
and all the stream beds of Judah
   shall flow with water;
a fountain shall come forth from the house of the Lord
   and water the Wadi Shittim. 
Challenge for Lent. Read the Book of Joel, ancient prophecy. Three chapters of Hebrew poetry, it will take maybe ten minutes, and it’s fun. What’s going on? In your Study Bible, read the introduction either before or after you read the prophecy. Or read the intro later, another day. If the intro is too certain about Joel and the situation and the setting and the time in history and whether its a unit, find another scholar or two and enjoy the discourse. Learn and enjoy.

Blow the trumpet in Zion;
   sanctify a fast;
call a solemn assembly
TW+